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What it’s Like When You are NOT a Sleeping Beauty Anymore

What would you do if you never had to sleep?

I saw that question on Facebook and could only think of the endless possibilities no sleep would bring. How many books could you write with eight extra hours a day? (Well okay, maybe 5–7 for us moms.) Just think how clean the house would be. Or how good of a mood you would be in if you weren’t exhausted.

But then I realized, moms who write don’t sleep that much, anyway.

7:07 a.m.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one. -Author Leo J. Burke

Time is up.

My alarm goes off, but I am already awake. My school age kiddo came to my bed to ‘sleep’ by me just 30 minutes before the soft musical alarm screamed. He’s sweet. He smells great and I want to hug his little body but at the same time, I just want his foot out of my spine so I can go back to sleep after a sleepless night of words racing in my head.

12:30 p.m.

When you’re a mom you just learn how to function sleep deprived and you get used to it. -Holly Marie Combs

Kiddo is in school and nap-time sweet nap-time has fallen upon the house, which means one thing.

Time to write or take my own nap.

With my firstborn this wasn’t a choice; sleep won every time. But with my second child I feel like I have become an energizer bunny mom, just without the energy. I keep going and going without knowing how.

Nowadays I usually choose coffee and words. Passion overrides sleep.

Plus, alone time is beautiful.

That and hot coffee.

2:33 p.m.

Facebook, Medium notifications, twitter, and email are all checked. And some writing is done. The daughter is awake and its almost time to pick my sweet little boy from school

And now I wish I had had a nap.

The coffee is wearing off, I’m debating another cup as I get in the car, snow boots on, and pick up the kiddo with more hugs and kisses.

4:45 p.m.

Mombie (n.) A sleep deprived supermom who feeds on caffeine and survives on sticky kisses and messy smiles. Mombies are master multi-taskers and suck it uppers -mombieclothing.com #writermom

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Feeling better. That 3rd cup of coffee was a good idea.

12:15 a.m.

Maybe that third cup wasn’t such a brilliant idea. But the words have flown off my fingers in a frenzy. The tapping has been like music to my ears, but my eyes are now stuck to the back of my eyelids. The Sandman calls so I listen, walking like a mombie to my husband who fell asleep waiting for me an hour ago.

I kiss his arm, wrap it around me and close my eyes.

12:38 a.m.

Be kind. You never know how many times a mom got up last night. -The baby sleep site

Still awake.

I had another idea that I love. The inspiration making the light bulb in my head turn on, lighting up the black room. I make a note in hopes to keep the muse alive for the morning light and roll over.

It doesn’t work.

My daughter coughs, sniffles, and wakes. She needs me.

1:00 a.m.

Back in my bed, the sheets cool and inviting. My husband smells like shampoo. The words still dance in my head, begging me to get them on paper.

But I don’t.

The Medium Gurus are right. I love writing and motherhood, but sleep is needed. I need to be healthy, especially for the kiddos. I let the words go silent, wrap my feet around my husband’s toes, and finally fall asleep.

Then it starts all over again in the morning.

Every day is different. There are times when I sleep without a problem and other days like this one. This is the life of a writing mom, to sleep or not to.

We’re not sleeping beauties anymore because our prince has already found us, kissed us and done the deed that lead us to motherhood. We’re sleepy queensWe stay awake to give stunning life in books and keep our little people alive and well.

And it is difficult.

I’m sure all creatives lose sleep for their passion, it’s part of the process, but it’s unique for mothers who already work hard for every minute of shut-eye.

We love writing and motherhood, but sleep is needed. We need to be healthy, especially for the kiddos. #writermom

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And Yet

If you’re completely exhausted and don’t know how you’re going to keep giving this much of yourself day after day you’re probably a good parent. -Bunmi Laditan

You type out the words thinking about how you might change a life or have someone understand you a bit better and feel alive. The way you find the missing puzzle piece for your story and the plot comes together and the characters become people to you. This is beautiful.

Or the way you hold your child in the night, the moonlight shining on their chubby cheek as you hum ‘Twinkle Little Star”. Your heart explodes causing an overflow of tears. That love is so strong. And that sleepless moment is perfect.

The way you can snuggle up with your spouse again and kiss their neck once you finally lay down again, helps you realize how great sleep truly is, and how good your spouse feels next to you. You gain an appreciation for the little things in life.

It’s so worth it.

We may not be sleeping beauties, especially with the bags under our eyes, but writing moms see the beauty in life.

So, get out there, mom. Get sleep when you can, stay healthy. And keep writing about the beauty of life so others can see it, too.

But for now, this sleepless mom is tired.

Good night, Queens.

We may not be sleeping beauties anymore, especially with the bags under our eyes, but writing moms see the beauty in life. We're queens now. #writermom

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